Monday, November 30, 2009

Are you ready to just let Him handle it?

I think that for me, the biggest thing I want anyone to know and the thing I try to tell myself every time I am dealing with an issue is, God is the one who can fix it. It seems to me that once we finally realize that there is NO issue to big for God, we will be much better off. I told someone the other day that it amazes me that there are so many people in the world that have problems, that think that calling a friend or family member will fix it all and God is the only one who hears our cries and is the only one who knows what to do and how to do it. Not only that, He can hear all of us, ALL at the same time. I have a hard time listening to my three children at once, but not only can HE and does He listen, He helps us all. All we have to do is be willing to share with Him. I mean you might as well, it's not like He doesn't know anyway. Who are we trying to hide from???? I know for me, at one point in my life, I almost felt like I was actually "hiding" from God and HE couldn't see me so I was ok. Funny how your mind works when you do wrong.

Psalms 62:1 - " My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken."

I spent some time this past weekend with a really good friend. We are as different as night and day, but those differences make us bond very well and she confided in me some things that have been going on. Now I have said this over and over, I DO NOT profess to know all or ANY answers to situations that come up, but I just try to use what has happened to me to show people that things can and do change. So as she talked to me, I could hear the pain, almost feel it. She had come to a point in her life where although she grew up in church, knows the verses and songs, have heard them all her life, still can't figure out why things are happening like they are. Why she is not getting what she KNOWS is a good thing, and it really is. My comment to her was " are you REALLY talking to God"? I know its been a long time, but are you really talking and waiting for him to answer? Not in YOUR time, because it's never in our time, but in His. I really believe that God allows us to make our own decisions. I mean isn't that why we tend to get in trouble most of the time, doing things OUR way? But when we totally and fully say " God I am giving this to you and I am going to let you handle it however you see fit" and leave it alone, is when we can start to see His plan unfold right before our eyes. I really believe that, I have seen it in my own life. Our 10 or 15 years of pain and suffering in "our" time seems really long, but I don't think God works on that kind of time line.

There is nothing man can tell me, good or bad, that I know God can't go back and change. He sees, and hears and all He is waiting for is us to come to Him openly and honestly asking for help when we need it. He's all you need and as it says in Psalms 62 your soul should find rest in God alone.

This is my all time favorite song we sing in church!! Really!! Every time we sing it I get chills!! In it it says.... "when the oceans rise and thunders roll, I will soar with you above the storm. Father you are king over the flood. I will be still and know you are God." That's what we need to do.. KNOW He is God and no matter what happens, no matter what you think will happen, just chill and talk to Him. He can handle any and EVERYTHING you throw at Him!

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving! Lord willing, we will talk again soon!

Monday, November 23, 2009

My gray hair

"Gray hair is a crown of splendor, it is attained by a righteous life" ~ Proverbs 16:31

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted gray hair. Not a strand here and there, but like salt and pepper hair and all of my friends thought I was crazy. But I an remember seeing the African American women with that beautiful hair and loving it. When I hit about 26, I saw my first gray hair and about freaked. I mean I wanted it but not one LONG strand right in the front so hence the coloring started. Since then I have done all kinds of things with my hair, from color, to cutting, to letting it get longer, to going natural, to going back to a relaxer and color last week. Now at 36, I have MORE gray, not completely salt and pepper but the color definitely does not take on the

And although the gray hair WILL come with age, alot of other things will to I hope. Knowledge and wisdom for one. Not that I didn't realize how important God was in my life, the older I get though, I realize that God and heaven are way more attractive than anything the world can offer. The older I get, through all the hair dyes, the knowledge I gain in Christ is worth every single gray hair to make me the woman God wants me to be!

I hope you all have a blessed Monday. Love you and until next time, Lord willing....

Friday, November 20, 2009

Thank you!

I love Facebook. It's my way to stay connected to my friends and family that I do not get to see very often. What amazes me about Facebook is how free people are with their words and thoughts and I mean that in a good way. I can remember being in high school and not remember a person talk about God. I mean we all went to Church, that was a given, but to actually talk to someone about God, give advice about it.. well it was almost unheard of. Fast forward almost 20 years and you have Facebook. And it's wonderful. I think every one of my classmates (and family) encourage each other every day. Last night for me was no exception.

I have been in a mood lately, a funk if you will. The holidays are coming up, there are alot of things on my mind surrounding that and just alot of other personal things I am dealing with. and some of it are things that are probably just in my head more so than anything else, but none the less, they are there. I have been praying really hard the last few weeks that whatever it is, God take it away and deal with it. But last night, it got a bit overwhelming and you know how it's those times that no one seems to be around... well I decided to take it to FB... yep, put my business out there and once again my friends and classmates came to my rescue.

See, I know that in times of trouble and need that I can pick up my Bible and God has given me all the things I need to get through anything. Philippians 4:6-8, 2 Corinthians 4:7-10, and Psalm 46:10... I know all I have to do is be still and listen. Know that God is God and He does just what He says He will do, but last night I had to hear it. Physically hear it and God sent that through the form of my friends. I love you all very much, you have no clue what that meant to me and although I had stress last night, some caused by my own mind, some caused by other things, I actually got through last night with no tears.

Pam says all the time, be blessed and BE a blessing... you were definitely mine!

Until next time Lord willing, be safe, show love and compassion and never think the small things don't matter... they really do!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Shaniya Davis

It broke my heart when they announced on the news that the little 5 yr old girl, Shaniya Davis was found dead. To see those precious pictures flash on the news and to think someone had done harm to her, well, I just couldn't imagine. I had seen her father on TV when they realized she was missing and I saw and heard the pain in him. He wanted his little girl back. And then the announcement.... they found her and her mom was in jail for selling her for sex. Even now, it still brings tears to my eyes.

Then this morning, as they were talking about it, her dad, visibly broken up said " This is not how I wanted it to end, but she is with God now and He has bigger plans." All I could do was cry. There is no way I can imagine losing my children, especially that way and then to say what he said. As Christians, that is what we are SUPPOSE to do, but sometimes, honestly it is easier said than done for us.

Jeremiah 29:11 says " For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you plans to give you a hope and a future."

I don't know why that baby had to suffer like that and Lord knows I hate she had to, but God doesn't lie and we have to believe that there is a reason, there are plans for her family. I don't know what her family believed, but I really believe that Shaniya is with God. No pain, no suffering. Be praying for her family though, her father AND her mother.

I really hope you all have a good day and as bad as this situation is, be reminded that a long life is promised to anyone. We take that for granted sometimes that when we send our children to school, we go to work, that we will all come back to see another day. Do the things you need to do in the moments you have.

I love you all, have a blessed day and Lord willing, we will talk again soon.

Monday, November 16, 2009

So, we have started a new series in church..leadership, and last night we talked about leadership and helping others. I really believe that are lives are to be about just that, finding the needs of others and making sure that if there is anything we can do to help, that we do it. I also know how hard that can be. I mean we see people on the street corners and we are afraid to stop and do something because we never know what they will do right? You don't want to give them money because you don't know how they will spend it. You really don't know them all that well, and why should you stick your nose in their business?

Last night Greg asked us what keeps us from helping others and those were a few of the reasons along with something else I said... people can be draining and take advantage and after all, no one likes to be taken advantage of. Then someone said something that got me thinking..." Jesus didn't say " help one another UNTIL they take advantage of you". He said to help one another. She went on to explain that if we are doing things with the right motives, with the right heart and with nothing on our minds but pleasing God, then the being taken advantage of, the worrying about what if they don't spend the money right, the fear of helping and getting hurt in the process will not be an issue because I really doubt God would ask us to do anything that he knows would harm us. He would be right there with us.

But I also contend this notion. It's not just the people on the streets and the ones you physically notice that need help. There are people closer than you think. They may live next to you, work with you or even attend the same church you do. See it may or may not be about money all of the time. Help comes in all forms and its up to us and Christians to really get to know the people around you. Find out if there are any needs that you may be missing and DO something. Thanks to my daughter, there are some things now that the two of us are able to do and it makes me proud that she is paying attention even when I don't sometimes!

With the holidays coming, I really think now especially time to kinda look around and see what we can do. The economy is not good, people are being laid off left and right and there are alot of people who may want nothing more than for someone just to listen. Make it a goal to really seek and find that person. Pray about it and let God show you what needs to be done.

James 4:17 " Anyone, then who knows the good he ought to be doing and doesn't do it, sins"

What else is there to say?

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Happy Birthday Momma!!!

November 12, 1946 in New York City, NY, my momma was born. That would make today her birthday. You know, every year around this time, I start to feel " funny" and I never really figure it out until that day pretty much but I miss her lots. There are pretty much no days that go by that I don't think about her in some way. From the way I cook, the way I raise my children to just looking in the mirror since everyone thinks we were twins or something. lol I even still have times when I ask God " Why" or " Could you not have waited just a little longer" and you know what, I think that's okay, He doesn't mind too much... at least I pray not. But as sad as I get about missing my mom, I can smile a big smile knowing she died doing the things God wanted her to do. That I have no doubt about because I saw it every day of my life. And because she did believe that Jesus was Christ and he died to save this world, I believe John 3:15-16:

" For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, that who ever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life in heaven."

I don't know God's thoughts, His complete plan or what really happens after death, but I believe with all of my heart that my mom is with God and I'm going to see her again one day! I love you momma, Happy Birthday!!!!! MUAHHHH!!!!

And to Melanie... once again as I always tell you, you share a really special day with her too! HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL!!

Jessica, I always forget... one day before or after but I know its your day too HAPPY BIRTHDAY, I miss you!!

As always, have a blessed day everyone and Lord willing, we will talk again soon!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

I don't have alot and most of the time I am whining about what I think I need, but if I actually sat down and stopped being so selfish, I would realize that God as given me so much in my life. Not as much as some but definitely way more than others and I should be thankful. I am truly blessed.

We always say that too don't we.... " God is going to bless you for this or that" and as true as that is, God will bless you, I think we are expected to be a blessing to others as well. My friend Pam normally puts that on her Facebook page each day (be blessed and be a blessing) and I like that.

The Lord has done so much for all of us, the greatest being that He gave His mercy in that he died for sinners like us. He allowed us to be apart of the great things He has done in this world and we should not be trying to keep it all for ourselves. I don't think that is what He intended. He expects is to share those things with the world around us, with the people we come in contact with in our lives. God gives to us lovingly and freely so that we can freely an lovingly give to others. Make it a daily goal to share that with others.

Luke 12:48 "But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." (NIV)

I hope you all have wonderful day! Lord willing, we will talk again soon

Friday, November 6, 2009


It doesn't take much for me to stress out. I worry about everything and I think all the time. I mean about everything... things I need to do, things I should be doing, how I can change things and things I have no control over.The other day in my e-mail I got a devotional from The Purpose Driven Life and it was entitled " Why Worry" and immediately caught my attention.

In it, Rick Warren said that there really is no need to worry. Its unreasonable, it's unnatural, it's unhelpful and It's unnecessary. as I read it I thought to myself, " that may be, but seems like I cannot stop doing it". But as I kept going something stood out. He said when you were little and you asked you dad for lunch money, you never gave it a second thought about where the money would come from, that was your dad's problem, not yours. So why not apply that same reasoning with God. Sounds simple and as humans, we again tend to think we can handle everything that pops up in our lives. Well I do anyway. But trusting in God and really believing what Matthew 6 says:

"If God gives such attention to the appearance of the wildflowers- most of which are never seen, Don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do His best for you? What I am trying to do her is get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way He works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how He works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions.Don't worry about missing out. You'll find that all your human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the times comes". (MSG)

will help us all deal with any problems that Satan tries to throw at us.

This has been a long week. I have had ups and downs all week long and its all because of stress and things I cannot change. So I decided to make a conscience effort to just pray about it, tell God what the deal is and see what happens. I know that by doing His will, if something is not right, He will reveal it to me. So for now, I just sit and wait.

It's Friday and I hope and pray you all have a wonderful, blessed weekend. I think its gonna be really nice here! Lord willing, we will talk again on Monday..

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Some days are just kinda BLAH......

I often wonder what triggers my emotions. One minute I am fine, life is good, nothing but positive going on and nothing can stop me. But then, a few hours later, today for example, I get the blahs. There is no rhyme or reason for any of it. No one has done anything to me, all really is well in my little world. But the feelings, emotions, mood swings come. Crazy I am not.. let me just put that out there from jump cause I know how people tend to think things, I am just " thinking out loud" to try and figure this out.

Maybe it's the holidays coming up. I mean Halloween was a few days ago and Christmas music and scents are filling the air. Suppose to be a happy time but sometimes I get a little blah during that time of year. Thank God for the kids, or I would be a total scrooge!

Maybe its the whole taking care of kids alone thing. Do not get me wrong at all.. I Love my babies. They are the reason I get up in the morning and do what I do and that's the God's honest truth. But I get tired. I run from the time I get up until after the practices are over and then its home for homework and dinner with bed soon to follow for them. They keep me on my toes with the activities, the wittiness, the laughs... but yeah, I get worn out.

I miss my parents alot. You know, no matter what I had done (good or bad) I could just go and say " this is what happened" and they would fix it. Not fix it in the sense that everything was automatically alright, but in the sense that they talked to me, helped me think things out, and just made me feel better. I look and listen at people today who say things like how their parents make them mad, or they wish this and that. All I can say is I WISH mine were here to do any of those things. I hate that they missed so many things. Missed physically anyway. The grand kids being born, me finally finishing school, alot of things. There was just a real calming feeling I got talking to them. I knew when they spoke, things were going to be okay, no matter how upset I was,. And even if it didn't go the way I wanted, it was still ok. I miss them alot!

Sometimes I sit at my desk at work and look out my window. There is this huge oak tree outside and a park on the other side of that. During the spring, I get to see the birds do their thing, building nests, bringing food in... and fall, like now, the leaves are really pretty. Not a whole bunch of birds, but I like how the leaves and limbs move with the wind when we have it. I am all about calm and peace ( if you haven't figured that out by now).. and I can drift for a minute when I look out there.

I love my job. actually I haven't ever had a job I hated, even when I worked at Wal-Mart after high school. But now, I really feel like God placed me here for a reason. Some of those reason I see everyday, I know exactly why He did it. My job is not hard, but it has to be right in order for things to flow well. I do them ok.. I hope so anyway. The people are nice, they put up with me after all. Some days I can be a real prick.. mornings especially. I have this thing about mornings and coffee and not talking to me too early. Yeah, I know, you don't have to tell me, but it is what it is. But I love them for putting up with me and understanding things that not many employers would. My kids and I am REALLY lucky to have them.

My church.. I mean what can I say about my church family. I love them, I love them, I love them! I think when God decided He needed my parents in heaven, He sent me to Westwood so that I wouldn't feel as alone and have family that would step in whenever I needed them too. Now don't get me wrong, we are not perfect. We don't profess to be, but I can honestly say that everyone there is really about God's business. It's not about us, it's about what they(we) can do to serve others. There was a point in my life when I wasn't so sure about them.. I will admit that to you and most of them know it too. But I will have to thank my kids for this one... when I didn't feel like getting out of bed, when I had partied too much and 9:30 came WAY to early for me, or when I just didn't feel like going.. they always MADE me go. YEP, my kids made me, the adult go to church and participate and until the day I see my mom and dad again, I will never hank them enough. See, its not the building, its the people in it and my kids saw that. They saw love and true friendship and they wanted me to see it too. Took me a minute or maybe two.. but I finally got it and I plan on keeping it a long time!

Then I have these friends. Well I use to have lots and lots of friends, but I learned the hard way that not everyone that calls you friend really is and they actually mean more harm than good so some relationships had to end. That was okay though b/c through that, I found the ones that will stick closer to me than a brother. You know, the ones that tell me just how it is, don't let me get away with CRAP and love me even more?!? That's them! They know me, the real me that not alot of people know or even want to know. And they accept me, flaws and all. All I can say is keep it up cause you know me and my moods.. ever changing like the wind.

Then there is my boyfriend. Even saying that makes me smile the biggest smile ever. God totally blessed me with loving parents, wonderful children, a great job and a loving church and Then after all of that, I get this man in my life, finally, who understands and accepts me, knows that everyday is not going to be perfect, he really cares about my children and their well being, he can tell me to STOP and calm down and say it in loving way because he cares about me, but, and I really honestly know this, feel this and see this... he loves God. Like I have never had that and he knows that everything is in time in God's plan no matter how much my kinda OCD self wants to rush. He is my level head when mine is not so level. There is not a day that goes by that I am not thanking God for him. I have no doubt in my mind that with everything I have been through and done, God was preparing me for him and I love you so very much!

Hmmmm..... I started writing this with a really blah feeling. Knowing it was nothing but Satan playing with me and trying to get me all flustered, but as always for me, writing stuff down, no matter how confusing it sounds to all of you, ends up being something totally different. I imagine I will have blah days, we all will, but realizing the things I have in my life that make those BLAH days a little better.. actually alot better. God is good, I really don't give Him enough of me ya know. For everything I have, I need to be thanking Him every second of the day. There, I have that sense of calm again.. I like it here.

Thanks for letting me vent, share, talk....
Yesterday I got an e-mail from a really good friend and it said " If you knew you would never see or hear from me again, what would you tell me today'?

My first initial response was WOW, what a question and how do you answer that? But I replied and I started to think, what would the world be like if we really DID tell people what we wanted to say to them without hesitation. What would the world be like if we all got positive encouragement from each other daily, what would God's family be like? I think we sometimes think saying things like that can get kinda mushy or even that we have all the time in the world to say what we need to. But as Matthew 24 says: "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." We need to spend our time encouraging one another, building each other up and stop tearing each other down.

Nothing long and drawn out today, just " If you knew you would not see your friends and loved ones anymore, what would you tell them? How would you encourage them? And what exactly are you waiting on??

Love and blessings to all!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

There was a time in my life when I thought that talking to God was pointless. My attitude was VERY negative and basically I got tired of talking and nothing I asked for was being answered. Maybe more than anything else, it was fear. The negative thinking had caused me to think I COULDN'T do anything anyway so praying was useless... so I didn't do it.

Not sure at what point it all changed, and alot of things happened in between all of this, but I realized that I was looking and thinking all wrong. I was hoping my prayers would be answered instead of having the confidence in God to believe what He said and trust in Him. James 5 says the "prayers of a righteous man are powerful and effective." And you know what, the things we ask for will not happen overnight. That was the hardest for me to understand and learn. But look at Elijah.. he prayed for rain for over three years, and it didn't rain. He never quit, never stopped believing, never gave up on the fact that God does what he said He will do. He prayed and God sent rain.

Another hard thing I had to learn was that sometimes my prayers WERE being answered, just not in the way I would like them to be. See, we are told to ask, have faith the size of a mustard seed and we can move mountains, but if it's not in accordance with God's Will, you can hang it up. God is not going to give us anything in our lives that will not uplift us and bring glory to Him. When our desires do line up with His Will, we will understand why some things are just not meant to be for us. When we pray passionately and purposefully, according to God's will, God responds powerfully. Always!

God is there, waiting on us. He wants us to come to Him not only when we have problems, but when we have good things to tell Him too. Alot of times, and I have been very guilty of this, when good stuff happens, I get in my head that I was the one who made it happen. I mean after all, I was the one who did this or that right? But who was the one who allowed that to happen?

So pray with confidence, knowing that God hears your prayer, that he loves you and wants nothing but for you to be with Him forever and that He will answer. Tell Him the good, bad and ugly. No need in trying to hide it anyway, He already knows! He may answer right away or it may take years, who knows but I am positive it will be in a way that will grow you and grow your walk with Him.

I love you all bunches. Have a wonderful day and Lord willing, we will talk again tomorrow : )